How to speak body language

They say it only takes three seconds to make a first impression. That’s because you are already being judged by your appearance and body language, even before you open your mouth. In fact, research shows that communication is 55 percent body language and 38 percent how you speak – your tone of voice, volume, pitch, etc. Which leaves a mere 7 percent of communication being about what you actually say.

With such statistics, it pays to think about what your gestures, facial expressions, posture and overall body language are telling others.

Everyday interactions
When you put a smile on your face, move with confidence or stand up straighter with your shoulders back, you can actually trick yourself into feeling happier, being more confident or appearing taller and more important. And if you can trick yourself, then you can certainly convince those around you.

Many of our gestures are done subconsciously or out of habit. So your body could be sending out messages you don’t mean, or at least messages you would prefer others not to see. For example, avoid folding your arms across your chest unless you want others to think you are unapproachable, defensive or annoyed. Fidgeting, scratching, touching your face and hair, wringing your hands, tapping ... these movements can make you appear nervous and unprofessional.

Making a first impression
When you meet someone new, it’s important to make a good first impression because it’s very difficult to reverse a bad one. So try to be aware of your facial expressions, gestures and movements.

First of all, smile. People will interpret this as an open and friendly gesture. Not only will it help you feel more relaxed, but it can help put the other person at ease, too. Just don’t overdo it, or you could come across as artificial, or too relaxed.

In face–to-face interactions, eye contact is important. Looking away or avoiding eye contact can reveal a lack of interest, insecurity or insincerity. More confident people make more eye contact, so learn to look people in the eye, but never do it for so long that it makes them feel uncomfortable.

Something else that can help, for example, in an interview, is to subtly mirror the body language of the interviewer. This helps create rapport and build trust. Of course, as with smiling and eye contact, overdoing it can make others feel mocked or uncomfortable.

Giving a presentation
When you stand up in front of a large group of people, it’s natural to be nervous. So try to stand tall to give yourself extra confidence. Try not to freeze up your facial expression, but smile now and again to relax yourself, and your audience.

Another thing a good speaker needs to do is to interest and engage the audience. This can be achieved by leaning forward slightly to show you are interested in connecting with the audience. Making eye contact – try it with one person at a time – will also make the audience feel engaged.

Meaningful movements and gestures are a good way to show your passion about the topic and bring the message across. But when presenting to a large group, do make sure your gestures are bigger and more exaggerated than normal, so they can be seen by everyone in the room. Make gestures using your arms and shoulders, rather than just your hands and wrists.

Being a good speaker, acting confident when you’re not or eliminating bad habits require practice, so do work on it. If you’re not sure how you appear to others, film yourself. You might be surprised by what you see.